:) :(

This morning wow i was happy i was actually happy without even trying, i walked to school playing happy song in my ipod, and i smiled i didn't stop smiling. :)

then come lunchtime it hit me, jesse had gone off somewhere with david everyone and their boyfriends were sat round the tree in the rain and i stood in the middle of the atrium and felt like crying, D: i tried to be happy i tried to join all the people under the tree but the more i was there the more i felt alone, people kept coming up to me saying are you okay charly? your looking ill. ): i did run off to the toilets to wipe the tears off but the girls in there kept saying omg theres a crying girl in their, i text jesse to let her know i was feeling sad again she normally cheers me up or atleasts gives me a hug but i then got a text from one of her friends saying something like: look jesse is sad and has her own problems she can't always be here for you or me. i really didn't want to here that from anyone except jess, i hate it when personal things are shared, but its okay for her she has dom she has the one that I like ): so when she doesn't have jess she can have dom someone special just for her, i don't, jesse was my someone special, my run to and cry person but now she just doesn't want to know?

*wants to die  D: *