must it always be chaos in this house?

max is 20 now,
he is supposed to be paying something like £50 a week rent,
he earns about £400 a week,
so it's not that much considering he doesn't have to pay for anything else,
he gets fed,
clothed,
has friends around every night,
makes a mess and doesn't clean up,

and still doesn't pay?
again like mum yesterday
how can he see dad struggling with money and just deny him what he owes him?
that would just kill me ):
but then again i can only think it's because dad is soft,
he asks, but doesn't demand,
then just lets him get away with it,
thats not helping anyone?
i would really like to not be here for much longer,
cause everyone is either
depressed,
drunk,
angry,
crying,
high,
fighting,
etc.

it's so hard to fucking have a good time?!!!

sorry
thats why all my posts are so D':

i wish i could right happier ones.
i wish i could get out of here!!!
school is my only get away.
and thats full of bullshitters
sex addicts
and druggies!!!!